An Odyssey of Sodholmy: Steven’s Journey

The Daily Bale’s Steven Sodholmy Recently embarked on a trip around the United Kingdom in the Daily Bale News van to visit different areas of the county and identify towns that have been overrun with the Left-Wing disease.


Sodholmy’s Odyssey: picture of Steven

I have always been curious about the Left/Right divide that sprawls through this country but I wanted to see which towns and cities have been completely overrun with Left-Wing politically correct perverts and how the Left have destroyed these places.

My friend Barbara told me about a town in the south West of England called Glastonbury, apparently this town had been completely taken over by greasy dreadlock wielding left wing activists. It has been alleged that the town of Glastonbury is also a UAF stronghold as there is a recruiting station based there.


Glastonbury: vile hippy filled town in Somerset

Upon arriving in Glastonbury, I could smell the distinct fragrance of the drug known as cannabis. I’ve always known that Cannabis has been the popular drug of choice amongst lefties since 1966 and you can normally always identify vermin if they smell blatantly of the drug.

After parking up the van behind the historic ruins of Glastonbury abbey, I noticed a group of young white men with dreadlocks standing outside the entrance of the Abbey smoking to what me appeared to be a joint of cannabis. One of the dreadlock freaks had a t-shirt which read, “we’re blacks. Whites Asians and Jews” which reminded me of a song that the UAF sing at their protests.


Weirdos and perverts: Strange people are all over glastonbury

I realised that Glastonbury was a very ‘young’ town, everybody seemed to be under the age of 25 and out of education or work. it was clear to me at this moment that Glastonbury was a Town of uncivilised weirdos and perverts.

I was hungry so I headed towards a bakery in the centre of town called, “Bakers Joint”‘ upon entering the small bakery building I noticed that a statue of Lenin rested on top of the counter with the caption, “long live our glorious leader” etched into the stone that held the bust. The only food that was available in Bakers Joint was vegetarian Linda McCartney weirdo food, the type of food that should only be given to animals. I shook my head and walked out in utter disgust.

My next port of call was a clothing boutique next to the bakery, the store called “glastowear” had a cannabis leaf transfer stuck to the outside window and I could see a pro labour party leaflet celotaped under it.

As I walked Into the store, I noticed it smelt like decrepit old people, like somebody had died and pissed their pants as they fell. The sort of clothes on offer were baggy, loose fit clothing that encourage your trousers to fall down and bare ones buttocks to its fullest extent, Along with hoodies and other left-wing clothing, I noticed a series of UAF logo t-shirts that were being sold with a 10% discount on offer to anybody that holds a UAF loyalty card,

As I walked out of Glastowear, I noticed the same gang of dreadlock freaks walking by the Window, It was at this moment that I decided to follow them from a distance down the glastonbury highstreet.


More weirdos: they litter this town and hang around like a bad smell.

As I cautiously followed from behind, I watched as the dreadlock gang openly spat on the floor and cussed at old people who were walking by, these were truly Terrible people. After about five minutes of following the gang, they led me down an alleyway at the bottom end of town. The alleyway which was protected by a large black Gate was the entrance to a dark deep world, I decided to penetrate the hole further and push Into enemy heartland.

Down the alleyway was a UAF recruitment office, the dreadlock gang had been operating directly out of this hellish building where unforgivable acts of betrayal and anti-British plots are planned. I decided at this point to head back down the alleyway and continue with the odyssey.

Just outside of Glastonbury I had noticed a large mound, sticking up from a field with a large erected building, standing on top. The local residents of Glastonbury informed me that this is what they called “The Tor”. With great anticipation and a hellish climb ahead, I decided to investigate the Glastonbury Tor,

The climb up the mound was scrotally painful, I had to stop off on 20 separate occasions to catch my breath and have a cigarette break so I could restore nicotine levels. After a long 40 minute climb, I reached the summit of Glastonbury Tor and peered out across the vast plains in front of me.

Scratched into the historic tower that stood proudly ontop of the mound was a load of communist, Left-Wing symbolism so it was clear that the building had been used for satanic leftist rituals in centuries gone by. Dissatisfied by findings, I headed back down the mound at one point being chased by a flock of possessed goats.

In conclusion, Glastonbury is a vile little town filled with Left-Wing perverts and anti-British overtones. My time there was truly terrible and this is not a town I intend on returning to anytime soon. It is clearly a UAF stronghold and after wading through the stench of sickening leftist perverts and Linda McCartney food, you will feel utterly Ill and void of any human emotion.

Senior Reporter,
Steven Sodholmy

Daily Bale


16 thoughts on “An Odyssey of Sodholmy: Steven’s Journey

  1. Hi
    I’m not really sure where to start. For one I find it hilarious the way you slate the ways and people of Glastonbury purely for the fact that Glastonbury is a haven against money grabbing scum like you. You are a prime (dosent do it justice) example of why Glastonbury is the way it is. The people have culture and character they are individual and creative. They are very kind and thoughtful and at one with peace. You are the opposite of all this, you are a boring up your ass snobby ignorant little prick, this is reflected in your article (if you could call it that) I mean it’s like your a fat 17 year old kid with no life or friends who just sits at home trolling everything good in the world because they are jealous they are not this. What is wrong with you like seriously what gives you the right to come and judge other people and ways of life just because YOU are different, this makes you a huge hypocrite when it comes to your bullshit spiel of loving the British people. You sir are a grade A cunt and you are the reason Glastonbury is the way it is because who the fuck would want to be like you. You exaggerate the shit out of how left wing Glastonbury is and to be honest every political fight protest and effort the people of Glastonbury put their time into is to stop the injustice of the money grabbing war mongering government who you might aswell be on your knees sucking the dick of. Britain would be a far healthier friendlier and greener country if everyone lived in their way. I also find it quite funny how actual residents have caught you taking photos of underaged girls and boys for our terrible article. Also how niether of the places you claim to visit even exist and the amount if glastofarians that have called you out on this just makes you look fucking stupid to be honest. And just for the fun of it and I’m sure to everyone’s enjoyment it took you 20 breaks and 40 minutes to climb up the tor, you fat cunt you unhealthy middle class piece of shit, prehaps lay off the baked goods tubby and eat some vegetarian food prehaps you wouldn’t be such an unfit disgusting thing who stalks people down alleys. In what way is anyone a pervert in any sense your just calling people names. You are an embarrassment to Britain, to media and most of all as a human being. You might be reading this just sitting in some scubby little hole somewhere with some £2 prostitute because your a sick lonely man laughing at a 19 year old writing this comment but the fact is no matter how ignorant you are about what I’ve said more people will agree with me and back me because I am a Glastonbury local and I have proved myself far superior to you not only as a Internet commenter but as a human being. You are a ignorant biased hypocrite and I hope you never return here because this is a place devoted against people like you.

  2. I am the person whose photo of 2 young girls at Glastonbury you have used on your dreadful blog. Why didn’t you contact me to ask permission — which I certainly would not have given, as you have defamed two innocent people by captioning the photo as ‘Weirdos and Perverts’. I also find your overall view of the town of Glastonbury to be narrow-minded and bigoted.

    I am now removing the photo from Flickr so that it cannot be used in this way again and I insist that you remove it from your blog as you have broken copyright laws.

    Peter Cook

  3. Dear Stephen,

    I’m sorry to hear that your experience of Glastonbury was not entirely pleasant. If you ever choose to return, I recommend you put your political beliefs aside for a time and merely enjoy the beautiful countryside around it. It’s true that Glastonbury is a very left wing town, and it has every right to be, just as you have every right to your political opinion. Next time you visit (and I hope you do), I recommend Burns The Bread bakery if you’re in the mood for a meat pasty. There’s even the famous Glastonbury pasty, in which the main ingredient is beef. A lot of beef – it’s delicious. There are also many traditional roasts served in the local pubs, as well as Knight’s Fish ‘n Chips who serve absolutely delicious, well, fish ‘n chips. I’ve never heard the establishments you mentioned in my time living here, and am interested to know what area of the town you were in.

    Kind regards,

  4. Hello there dear Steven,

    just wanted to mention a thing or two that were niggling me a tad, dont mean to cause any offence, but you know how it is, us humans do love to voice our opinions.

    Firstly, the quality of your writing is truly appalling, and it clearly displays your bigoted ignorance and the ridiculous magnitude of a void where ones intelligence is usually placed.

    Secondly i find it highly amusing how sanctimonious one can be, you state the town is clearly full of ´uneducated` people and ´uncivilized weirdos and perverts´ but i must say, im truly struggling to work out how you view yourself as ´educated´ when you spend your time putting together blind sighted, dimwitted and unnecessarily hostile articles (although even you attempt to hostility is poor) whilst apparently stalking people (including two young girls) and publishing photos without consent, which forgive me if im wrong, but would be usually viewed as perverted behavior.

    Additionally you say that visiting Glastonbury will leave you feeling utterly ill and void of any ´human emotion´ so what human emotion was lacking? It would be so delightful if you could advise us on this topic, as your obviously the expert in this field, your views indicate to a whole array of emotions, ranging from being abusive, cowardly, antagonistic, Arrogant, insensitive, belligerent etc, so yes, i guess the town is lacking in these. My humblest apologies dear sir.

    P.s i do also suggest you change the name of your blog, i find it rather misleading ` a news source that cares about the British people` – i see no sign of a caring attitude and a ´news source´ is meant to be factual, not a dismally weaved construction of lies and exaggerations.
    P.s.s next time you smell that peculiar cannibis odour, stay calm, investgate the scent, breathe deeply, inhale 1…2….3…4….wait for it…..exhale…1…2..3…. then when your ready pop over to that Bakery again, give that linda mccartney food a second chance, its only polite after all.

    But Most importantly, just think of this as a get well soon card, i hear this extreme ´right wing disease´ is getting round and has some very severe side effects, although please have the courtesy to not try and infect us all.

  5. It’s fairly obvious that at least part of your artical is pure fabrication, who’s to say you not just plucked these pics from the net somewhere? That first pic of the Tor is over a year old for starters.

  6. If you have an issue with this photograph then please take it up with the man who took the photo before putting it into the public domain:

    A Mr. Peter cook took this picture, you can contact him through his Flickr account. Your stupid remarks and unreasearched comments now make you look very foolish for assuming the the Daily Bale went back in time to 2008 to take this photograph.

    Please feel free to offer an apolagy,

  7. Yes – we magically went back in time to find you and your friend when you were whatever age you stated and purposely took pictures. The daily bale has a time machine which takes us back a few years when needed.

  8. I noticed in your abusive article, that you have taken a photo of me and my friend when we were both merely 14 and 15, you need consent to photograph a child under the age of 16. You do not have our consent there for I recommend you remove the photo before I take further action. You have also called us weirdo’s and pervert’s, you are the pervert taking photographs of children.

  9. ur a mug ur mums cunt is wide like your nans asshole im a 12 yr old thats been smoking ganja since i was 4 (brap brap) so i should know that being a badman is a lifestyle choice init faaaamalam

  10. You’re not even fucking trying any more Josh. When you get out of chokey you;ve got a new career – as an utter cunt.

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